An apology that includes the words "if" or "but" is not an apology.

"If" refuses to acknowledge there is anything to apologize for.

"But" is more insidious - under the pretense of an apology, the person actually reasserts they were right to do whatever it is they've done.

I think people should apologize properly, or not at all.

· · Tusky · 2 · 23 · 23

@loveisanalogue YES. If you haven't seen this brilliant sketch by Rachel Parris, I think you'll like it (trigger warning : mention of racism, islamophobia, sexual abuse, violent language, and sorry, there are no subtitles)


Chapman theorise 5 "languages" of apology. To explain why, sometimes, your sincerity is not understood by the other.

And there is no "if" nor "but", in any of the 5.
Because it is about sincerity.

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